Mysterious Girlfriend X 01: A Biblical Approach
Bodily fluids are funny things. They’re a source of dread throughout the world. Blood, menstrual blood, saliva are all feared and avoided. Spitting has been one of the worst insults possible for millennia. It’s funny when you consider that Genesis teaches man and woman shall become one flesh (Genesis 2:24). For all the literal and fundamentalist interpretations of the Bible, this is a passage all theologians are more than happy to take metaphorically. Become one flesh? For real? Yuck.
There are other ways of looking at it, of course. Keeping a lock of your beloved’s hair is romantic in a fancy sort of way, why not his/her spit? “Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man: but that which commeth out the mouth, this defileth a man” (Matthew 15:11). And yet if the man is holy, his spit cannot but partake of this quality. This isn’t just me making a logical point. Jesus’ spit heals blindness, after all (John 9). In this case what goes out of the mouth defiles neither the giver nor the receiver, and in fact it benefits the receiver greatly. This is part of the general shift from the law of the Old Testament to the freedom of the New, wondrously exemplified in the way the Catholic bastion of Europe, Spain, has historically indulged in such tasty products as blood soup and morcillas. And we all know what the Orthodox Romanians love to do…
The Japanese glorify/objectify/fetishize the objects of their affection to a “religious” degree (e.g. idols). The Will to Weeaboo is probably at least in part a yearning by a monotheistic people to break from that shell and worship however many gods/idols they want and abandon them at a moment’s notice, just like the Japanese do. In Japan, this glorification means that the object of affections’ fluids are much coveted. So much blind men seeking the healing spit. In a weird way then, the non-Christian Japanese engage in their own practices via mechanisms that themselves are recognizable biblically.
Thus speaks the fan: if and as long as I can’t get my own bodily fluids inside the idol, I’ll settle for obtaining as much as I can of theirs. Tsubaki’s decision to lick Urabe’s spit after she leaves might seem strange to (some of) us, but it’s really absolutely mundane. A pretty girl is a potential idol for any schoolboy. Tons of Japanese boys would have done the same in a similar situation.
The turning point of the story is elsewhere, in the “little voice” that Urabe hears when she aimlessly lays her eyes on Tsubaki. Translation: she’s decided to go for Tsubaki. Why would she go for an utterly plain boy? Well, if you’re a sufficiently unusual person, then everyone and everything around you is utterly plain. The question then becomes: why not Tsubaki? It has to be someone, why not him? Why is Everest the tallest mountain in the world? Everest replies: why the hell not? It was either me or K2 or Kangchenjunga, and then schoolchildren would suffer in their geography quizzes.
Urabe seems sufficiently unusual indeed. Her voice actress does a fine job portraying a girl who sounds disturbing and disturbed. I’m curious to see what she can do with a pair of scissors.
P.S. I don’t want any spoilers from people who have read the manga (not even announced, bracketed, whatever). I don’t care if you manage to write a comment with a little sound file that says “warning, warning, spoiler if you click here.” I don’t want to hear it.